I am trying to remind myself that this ms is actually progressing quickly and well, because I lost direction in chapter 4 today. I have all these nice pieces and scenes that I don't know what to with. I can't just randomly throw them together because they make sense; they have to add up to make a point and make the reader feel something. Only I don't know what. And I can't afford to spend time lost in a muddle of a ms because of all the other projects I'm slated to deal with, each with its own ticking clock. I need to maintain at least a modicum of focus here. Ugh. Frustrating.

What I'd like to do is take the ms up to where the gun goes off, and leave it there for now. But I don't know what belongs between the events of the MC's morning and the gun going off. I've got meals, conversations, gutting and skinning rabbits, informational memories, hair braiding, singing, and sex. How the f*ck am I supposed to know which ones go between the morning and the gun? The gun could possibly not go off for several days! Or it could go off that very afternoon. I don't really care when it goes off. It could go off right now, and that would be fine with me.

As Goku from Saiyuki and Saiyuki Reload would say, "Crappity crappity crap."